A Stray Sheep on Moving

Moving is stressful. Ugh. Today I ramble a bit about this and I’ll give an update on my moving situation.

We moved from our apartment back in 2003 when my brothers were about to be born as we needed more space. We moved into a new house that my parents bought back then. At the time, I didn’t really realise how much there is to moving. That said, we suddenly had a lot more space and we didn’t have to deal with the mould in the walls that our landlord didn’t wanna take care of back then.

In 2018, I moved out of my house after I graduated to live in the dorm near my university. At the time, I made a list of all the things I’d need… but my parents helped me out a lot.

Then, this September, I had to move out of there. I talked about not finding an apartment a lot on here in the past year but essentially it’s a journey full of frustration because of apartments being in high demand and landlords having free choice over who they’ll accept and who they won’t.

A lot of the time, I wondered whether my foreign last name gave me a disadvantage over other applicants with a less foreign-sounding last name. Every time I decided that that can’t be the case. It must be some other factors. I’m sure of it.

One time in August, I went to an apartment viewing and the person there didn’t even bother talking to me or another applicant who came for the viewing as well. We both had a migration background. The other people didn’t. We were ignored. Neither of us got the apartment. I never felt as insulted. We got the appointment but didn’t even get talked to or greeted. Neither of us got the apartment, of course. When the other people left and we waited our turn, the landlord said “You’re still here!?”, even. Like a caricature of a bigot.

But that’s just one time. One out of forty to sixty viewings I went to in the past year and a half – and it’s the only case of me knowing that it was some bigoted reason and not something else.

From 19, I didn’t even get a reply. In a way that’s more cruel than a rejection because the hope never dies.

One time, I was told that I was in the top 2 “but the other person got it because her boyfriend also has an apartment in the same house”. That didn’t make me feel better at all. In fact, it was quite weird.

Another time, I was told to “sleep over it and call in the morning”. I called the landlord in the morning and the apartment was gone. Clearly, they didn’t want to say “no” in person.

A friend had a similar experience where he arrived at the appointment and heard the guy talk in the hallway about how the apartment goes to another person already but the appointment was already made.

Why do you then waste both of your time?

So, looking for an apartment? Utter frustration.

Anyhow, it’s easy to assume discrimination or bigotry when you’re marginalized and getting rejected over and over and over and over again. It makes it hard to assume positive intent or ignorance or bad luck.

But aside from that one time, I don’t think it’s ever been because of where “my roots” are. At least I didn’t get that vibe from them. I got rejected because of myself and my lack in sales skills. I couldn’t sell myself well enough. That must have been it. Others were simply better or had a more stable financial situation. Probably.

Fast forward to now, though. I’m now moving again. As previously mentioned, I’m moving into my uncle’s basement from where I’ll have to travel for two hours to university and for another two hours back “home”.

This is just temporary and getting stuff ready for it doesn’t feel quite as stressful. It’s not exactly me “moving in” but rather me being a guest temporarily. Heck, I’ll even come back to my parents over the weekend due to a doctor’s appointment on Friday.

And well, November 1st will be the day I get to probably move into my new apartment.

Finally. I found one.

It was difficult but I made it. I finally got to talk to someone who liked me enough to give their apartment to me. Now it’s just a matter of time until that person gets out of their old apartment and before I get to settle into this new place, right at the main station.

I’ll hear lots of trains and traffic in the near future, I guess, but I’m very excited.

Anyhow, this was more of a rambly post while I was waiting for my father who went out to fuel the car before we drive to my uncle’s place. I figured I should write a bit about all the stuff I didn’t give y’all an update on.

I still won’t be able to stream for a while, I think. I’ve got to transit a lot but I’ll try to make time for blog posts still. I’ll also do a room tour once I’ve moved into the new place and settled in and stuff. :)

This post was originally written by Dan Dicere from Indiecator.

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